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Wednesday, September 29, 2010

ThaN I Met The THird KinD...

INsanity By Mag :-                                                                                      Manish Verma


I always thought that there are only two kinds of peoples in the INDIA, North Indian and South Indian, than i met the third kind “ THE Orissa Guys”. They are having like  pentium-1 inbuilt in their brain..... so slow, non sense in fact total worthless . BTW This is not about any racial discriminatory action and if u found anything like that than just go to hell man, I cant help u , this is all about ma Kerala trip. 


 I started ma journey at 5 in evening and m fully loaded with ma electronics gadgets( that contains only mobile and ipod *sad*) and a packet of cigarette .The very first thing I always used to do at platform is to check the reservation chart for any female in a group of 16-25 travelling with me and as always no one belonged to that category. The smallest female was of 27 years of age but interesting part was that her name mentioned with “miss” , that provokes me think again about ma age criterion. Should i increase the bar , should i decide it after seeing her, 16 years is too younger to me should i alter the criterion to 18-27..... too many question and a desire of another face off. Well train started and i settled on ma seat with ma broken heart.... railways cheated over me, they played with ma feelings , they printed mrs.27 as miss 27 on the chart......how can b they so rude, don’t they have heart and feelings, don’t they ever have any desire for females, y don’t they devide trains according to age and relationship status. I need some nicotine or caffeine or anything to make me calm down, I searched for ma cigarette packet and WTF....!!  only two*bad luck again* i rushed towards the gate and lit it , here i met someone....An Orissa Guy
OG: anna mada kuladi....
Me: *blank* ( what the fuck he is saying) I know only Hindi and sometimes English too.
OG: anna mada kuladi. *shouted almost*
Me: *blank*( just Fuck off.... let me smoke ma cigarette)
Suddenly someone put a hand over me and i turned in a reflection ....its TT , we were caught in offence of smoking in the train , OG started negotiating in his own language and only numbers are understand by me, First time in life i loved the mathematical numbers , we made a settlement of 100 bucks each, and after that i came to know that the TT was too from Orissa and this guy  was actually asking me about the  position of TT
OG: Y didn’t u replied me ?
ME: ohhhh so u know English..... than y the hell was u shouting in some aliens language.*angry*
OG: because U look like a south Indian *giggles*
ME: (Fuch off) *blank*
OG: Y r u so sad dude , its the matter of only about 100 bucks.
ME: ohh really *irritated*.... i have only two cigarette and that fucking TT ... if he wanted to charge me a penalty than y couldn't he wait to let me smoke first.... now i have only one golden stick in ma pocket.
OG: so where r u from ?
ME: UP *unexpected* Y so ?
OG: I knew that ( his eyes shining like he guessed correctly that where the OSAMA BIN LADEN was) u north Indians cant even handles the lightest situations.... u r like such a morons.
ME: ( This is the limit , i cant hear anyone to criticize us specially by this “anna mada kulide” guy.... i  have to answer...) * i enlighten ma last cigarette and started smoking again*  Only the north Indians can do this just after the penalty. *proud*
I reached the cochin at 5 in morning and ma train was parked in  between two trains , i was surprised where the platform was but.... janta..... they didn’t even care about that, they made their way to platform via railway line. So who m i to broke the lines , i too followed the crowd........  i called ma frnd to pick me up..... called once , twice, thrice.....almost  30th time but every time no reply..... WTF is this ,who made this creature like GF’s , he must talked to his GF late night and now sleeping like KUMBHKARNA. 70% infact 90% boyz efficiency was reduced by girls , they convert  them like a puppet who can talk to them, Admire them but cant do any other social activity but i realized its not his fault neither his GF's Fault, main victim is ORISSA, he is too from there.


I caught an auto for rest of ma journey and I didnt even noticed that ma other two co-passenger were two  hot chicks,  m so fucked up that hardly gave a look to them. I don’t want any more surprises, i just want to arrive at destination as soon as possible but this auto wallah.... i thought he is the relative of Michael schumacher. He was driving his auto (made in 1948) at the speed of at least 70-80 kmh and was busy with his mobile on the other hand, he used to turn the auto like anything. Many time ma hand touched the hot chicks hand and some of her sensitive part of the body. But somehow i managed to reached at destination before she filed any case of sexual harassment against me and finally i asked the most instigating question to the auto wallah....


Me: Where are u from ?


AW: Orissa....

18 comments:

CraZyFUNDU said...

gud one man!!!
u knw one thing..their language doesn't distinguish between genders...means 'jata hai' and 'jati hai' are same..so be aware!!!

nikita said...

hehhee...
great !!!!

love the way you depict simple incidents

Aashish Sood said...

but you are yet to meet the bengalis... and trust me, they are a separate class of human beings, if you can call them that, in themselves!!!

Girish said...

Dude, you always crack me up! :D
Hilarious!!
Loved it :))

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ज़ाकिर अली ‘रजनीश’ said...

Nice blog.
................
…ब्लॉग चर्चा में आप सादर आमंत्रित हैं।

Anonymous said...

There once was a boy named Mag,
A boy that just parties stag,
His blog really stinks,
And Mag really thinks,
That Nikita fancies a shag.

@l\lk!t l\/l!$l-lr@ said...

Manish u said if u use my lines atleast u wud mention it in ur blog but no...

The orrisa shit was mine..and so are half of ur posts...atleast use 'it happened to my friend....'.

umapoems said...

nice post..hilarious...keep us smiling :)

pallavi said...

That was a laughter riot... bookmarking you for me to come back and read more...

Btw, if you like my post, please vote for it at Indiblogger
http://www.indiblogger.in/indipost.php?post=34664

Thanks!

Mag[m] said...

@crazy.... that make blender sometime

@nikita.... thnxs sweet heart

@ashish... haha i heared abt them too... we do something for them too

@girish... thnxs man

@citi... all the best dude

@zakir... thnxs man

@anonymous.... thnxs dude.... ut may i know ur name.... u commented lil bit personal..

@ankit... thats true man.... whole concepts was advised by u...in fact ma whole blog was inspired by u... love u dude

@umapoems.... i will try for that...

Mag[m] said...

@pallavi.... thnxs dear... i will definitely read that

Samadrita said...

Well I'm not sure people from a particular region are all dumb or equally annoying..but it's rather that there are several millions of categories in which people all over the world can be classified into.
This post made me laugh quite a bit. Will come back for more. :-)
Anyway another vote appeal..but not a nonsensical unabashed outright one.
Vote for my Share Life entry only if you like it. So please do read..
http://www.indiblogger.in/indipost.php?post=34632
In this situation a vote will really help me. Thanks! :-)

Anonymous said...

First learn some English, dude. Using that bad grammar is an insult to the language. No offence, but that's the truth.

Mag[m] said...

@samadrita.... thnxs dear....

@anonymous..... thats why name is insanity....

Anonymous said...

well done chhore...liked it a lot...keep it up..

Mag[m] said...

@anny...bhai naam bhi likh diya karo...nyways thnxs

animesh said...

The post may be hilarious for some light fun, but on a serious note I would say, visit Orissa. Its beautiful. Meet some Oriyas, they are one of the most intelligent people I have ever met

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